Saturday, October 20, 2012

A "Private" Horror

  Kids, they make me laugh.  It doesn't matter their age, they are always doing or saying something funny.  The young ones though, they get me every time.  They are always coming up with new and inventive ways to say things, and discovering new things every day.  It's always an adventure when you have a toddler, nothing is sacred in discussions with them.  They will talk about anything!  They will discover everything!

Especially their "private parts". 

During a moment of "muscular weakness" on my part, I was especially frustrated at trying to get the panties back on my little girl.  She kept giggling and squirming while I was trying to get her feet into them.  It's just one of the things kids do, make getting dressed extremely difficult.  They enjoy watching us go from light-hearted to a frustrated ball of exasperation.

My arms now feeling like spaghetti, needed a break from the struggle.  I told her to have a seat on the bed.  She laid down, exploring her now naked buttocks and proceeded to check out her vaginal area.  Thus hilarity ensued...


Me:  What's wrong?

Toddler:  What is that thing?

Me:  What thing?

Toddler:  The thing growing out of my "hoo hoo"!

Her face was completely horror stricken as if some giant insect was forging it way out of her "hoo hoo" (our nice name for it)

Me:  That's your vulva (trying my best to not giggle hysterically)

Toddler:  What is it?

Me:  Your V U L V A, vulva.  It where your pee comes out.

Toddler:  Where does my pee come from?

Me:  Your vulva.

Toddler:  Why?

Me:  I don't know, God made you that way.

Toddler:  I don't want it!!!

Me:  You have to have it, all girls do.

Toddler:  All girls have my "bulba"?

Me:  No, you have yours and they have theirs.

Toddler:  Why?

Me:  I don't know.  Aren't you watching Dora or something?

Later on when the teenage daughter comes home, I go over this conversation with her and the toddler over hears. 

Toddler:  Look!  I'm touching my "Foofa"!!

Teenager:  Ew, gross, don't do that!

Me:  I am sure that "Yo, Gabba Gabba" would not appreciate you calling your vulva after one of their characters.

Toddler:  What?

Me:  Never mind.

And thus it begins....the private parts will no longer be private anymore.  *sigh*  Here we go again!
Just when I thought I had been through this with all the others, I get to enjoy even more!  Oh, yay for me!

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