Thursday, September 1, 2011

Beware the Creature that is MY UTERUS!

You know, I have always worried about my uterus. 
I have had so many kids and have heard it was enlarged more than it should be..... so it's concerned me a bit.  Then I heard it was tipped, so now this creature that holds my babies is even more odd.  I used to think it would one day fall out and start attacking us all, this odd growing, tipped creature.  Now, I really do believe that! 
It's GROWING everyday!  Apparently my creature doesn't realize I have stopped ovulating and continues to grow like I am!  It measures a whopping 17mm thick and lord knows how large it is itself, he didn't tell me!!  He just said it was unreasonably large.  Yes, unreasonably!

This thing could fall out and attack us all for not only is it growing daily, it's tipped beyond reason (my doctor has NEVER seen one tipped in such a way) and it's practicing eating people by eating on these things called grapefruit-sized fibroid tumors! 
Now, he is going to empty the contents of it on Friday of next week and if it doesn't fall out and start eating people, he is going to remove it and kill the beast soon.  I sort of picture it as "The Blob" but who knows, it may be more frightening looking!
Guard your children, your spouses, your loved ones,  your beloved pets.... for THE CREATURE THAT IS THE RED UTERUS may be coming for you soon.................. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!