If you think...

I have a need to say a few things... so if I offend you... GOOD!  The message hit home!

If you think life is easy, then you do not belong on this planet!  Life is a complex struggle between good and evil, right and wrong, the poor and the wealthy, the weak and the strong. If you are sailing through without any issues, I totally hate you. No, I mean it, HATE!

If you think the world revolves around YOU, why the hell am I not burning up?  That would mean you are the SUN!  Get over yourself, you ego-maniacal jerk and realize there are more people here than just you.  The only reason I wear shades does not have to do with "your" brightness, but the brightness of my future!  (Thank you for the great lyrics, Timbuk 3)

If you think I am going to pucker up these lips to any one's ass, you are sorely mistaken!  I am a genuine soul, I will tell you what I think, in my time, when I so choose, if I so choose!  This nose will never be brown, nor will these lips EVER suck the rectum of some loser to get what I want.  Just for those of you that do, I give you the one-finger salute!  How about being yourself to achieve your dreams or is that a new concept to you?

If you think you can move forward, kicking dust in my face, then I have some news for you.  I will be eating that dust just to spit it back in your face.  That's right, my honest ways versus your deceit will always win out.  When you look for me, I will be the one laughing and pointing, at the finish line, while you are still looking for your lost shoe in the race of life.

If you think I will go quietly, you obviously don't know me!  I will be singing, laughing, and dancing my way through everything that gets thrown at me.  I may stumble here and there, but the outcome will always be the same... TRIUMPH!

If you think I am alone in this world, look again.  GOD is at my side, and although I may not sound or write like a typical "Christian", I am.  What I say and how I chose to say it is between me and the "Big Guy' and not any of your concern.  Worry about your soul, I will worry about mine.

If you think you have to be mean to people to reach them, wake the hell up!  I bet I have reached more people with my kindness than you have with your nasty ways.  Why in the hell would people give you the time of day if you only show your ass?  Try smiling, or will that crack your face???

If you think that I'm a freak, thank you!  It's the highest honor to be different and not just one of the "sheeple".  If you literally follow the pack of the "what should be normal" in looks and behavior, I have lost all respect for you.  Be an individual for freak's sake!  The world has enough boredom running around, let's make it lively!

If you think all people weren't created equal, bye-bye!  I don't need you around in my life!  Close-minded assholes need not apply.  Love one another, people. I said love, dammit... LOVE!!

If you think this post is just a ramble, you are right.  But it's MY ramble, MY blog and MY RIGHT to ramble, so shove off!  (for those of you that have stayed long enough to reach this far, I treasure you)

If you think I love you, you are definitely correct :)

If you think I stole this photo, BUZZ!  Wrong answer!

Photo courtesy of Kristen Johnston

Follow her on Twitter @kjothesmartass
Read her book GUTS


(no, I am NOT smooching her butt...she is incredible, she is raw, she is incredibly funny and she is a friend and I totally love and respect this woman.  I also got her permission to use this photo as it went so well with my rant)  So bleh to you !  

P.S.  On a "health" note, for those that still tune in for my medical drama...  It looks like Myasthenia Gravis may be my new diagnoses.  Ick!  It explains EVERYTHING I have dealt with for the last few years.  I will be tested for the anti-bodies on the 11th.  I will update then, with a more in-depth explanation of this shit, MG. 

Kisses!